Dementia

 A few days ago, I saw an article by Dr. S.C. Sung, a neurologist in Chiayi, who wrote 22 reminders for his future self who might suffer from dementia. It moved me deeply. Dr. Sung has long served dementia patients and understands their plight well. Therefore, he used his professional perspective to write down how he hopes his family will treat him if he loses his memory one day.

This article has circulated widely online, and many people said they were moved to tears after reading it. But I think what truly touches people is that it teaches us how to treat someone who is "still alive, but slowly returning to childlike innocence." If everyone could read it at least once, perhaps we would be a little gentler towards our parents, our partners, and each other.

Below is Dr. Sung's full text (22 points), worth reading carefully.【Dr. S.C. Sung: If I One Day Lose Dementia】(Full Text)

My dearest family:

If one day I develop dementia, please hang this message on the wall of my room. I hope that when I can still understand it, seeing it will bring me peace. When I can no longer understand it, it will become your way of showing your love for me.

1. Every time you come in, please call my name first and tell me who you are. Otherwise, I'll ask you first, "Hello, who am I?" Please don't ask me, "Do you know who I am?" I might genuinely not know, and that will make me panic.

2. If I live in another timeline, please don't rush to pull me back. Please stay with me there. Perhaps I'm happier there.

3. If I say we're going to an old friend's house for dinner, or mention a deceased relative, please smile and believe it's true with me.

4. Don't argue with me. At that time, I really can't tell whether what you're saying is right or what I remember is right. Please let me win with love.

5. If I don't recognize you, please don't be hurt. It's not that I don't love you, it's that my brain is confused.

6. If I've forgotten how to use a spoon, don't rush to feed me. Please tie my bib and try to let me eat with my hands.

7. If you see me anxious or sad, please hold my hand. Don't tell me "Don't think too much," please sit quietly with me. 

8. Please don't treat me like a child. Even if I lose my language or understanding, my soul is still that of an adult.

9. ⁠. Please let me continue doing what I love.

10. Even if you've heard my story countless times, it might be the only one I still remember.

11. If I suddenly lose control of my emotions, please don't blame me. Try to find out why I'm upset.

12. Please treat me the way you would like to be treated.

13. Please keep some snacks at home.

14. If you're talking about me, please speak to my face, not as if I don't exist.

15. If you can no longer take care of me full-time, please don't blame yourself.

16. When I'm admitted to a facility, please remember to visit me.

17. When I mispronounce names or forget things, please be patient.

18. Please let me listen to music.

19. If I like to carry things around, please put them back where they belong.

20. Please allow me to maintain my faith and habits as much as possible. 

21. Please don't hesitate to hug and shake hands.

22. Most importantly: Please remember, I am still me. Even if I am no longer the person you remember, I am still the person you love.